Alone

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You really are alone in it when you have a mental illness. Some people just have no compassion or empathy at all and those people can be your nearest and so called dearest.  Because I have not had sex with my husband  (because I am 7 yrs old and traumatized alter ) he is angry at me. her.  It’s bullshit,  all her life is been about paying a price and yesterday she had trauma therapy and like she is going to want sex.  No trauma is ever mentioned in therapy but just the thought of therapy triggers the others.  So last night I made her cry cos I was happy that our t got me and he said he can’t deal with me tonight,  so off the tears switch.  Tonight I tried suggesting he goes out. There’s always something.  Not enough money no transport  no booze.  When there’s drinks in the fridge and he could go if he wanted.  No he doesn’t want to cos he wants to punch some cunt in the face.  That triggered us it wasn’t nice.  Because we know that some cunt is us because we haven’t sexually gratified him. 😦 fuckn life sux and everybody thinks I’m coping. Haha

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