I bet she thinks i don’t feel this bad. That I’m doing it for attention. She probably thinks I’m doing it for attention. It’s so not fair. Spose if we die we die nobody cares. I just tell her how i feel or whoever feels how they feel at the time. It’s like i don’t know how i should feel. I just have these things that just torture me and others who come out constantly and it’s not fair. I do think about suicide alot alot. We all have our own reasons. But oh yeah just before i was putting the kids down and i was like oh why would she say I’m at risk im not suicidal im not even depressed but now I’m like ohhhh that was somebody else. Cos I’m like trying to make the best plans.